Being subtle is an art. It takes a lot of practice and finesses to be able to pull it off effectively. These strategies are designed to help you manipulate people without them knowing it. Whether you want your boss to give you a raise or if you’re trying to make your significant other buy something they don’t need, these techniques will work on anyone! So take a look at how to be subtle and use these stealthy tactics to get what you want out of life.
Keep your facial expressions neutral.
Your neutral facial expressions can be used to your advantage. Remember that a poker face is always best when you don’t want people looking into what’s happening inside your mind.
- Keep an unchanging facial expression.
- Try not to smile or laugh for no reason.
- Ensure that someone who may pull out their phone and take a picture isn’t getting any pictures with you smiling (a good idea if they’re trying to use those photos against you).
Be mindful of the words you use and how they sound to others
Your words can be your best weapon or worst enemy. Have a goal in mind when you speak and how it may affect the listener.
Try using more questions instead of statements, as this will make others feel needed and valued. It also helps to create an atmosphere where people are encouraged to ask for things they want rather than assuming that someone else knows what’s best for them.
If something is bothering you about another person, find out how they would like their concern addressed before approaching them with it—this will help avoid coming off too strong or passive-aggressive by appearing to know better than the other person does how they should handle themselves.
Practice saying “No” without feeling guilty
The ability to say “No” and not feel guilty is one of the most powerful things you can do to manipulate people. It’s also a skill that takes some practice and patience with yourself to work well.
Start by telling yourself, “No,” when your mind starts thinking about doing something, whether it be making food for someone who hasn’t asked or putting on their shoes, so they don’t have to bend over.
It helps if you can think through how saying “no” will make them feel before using this technique and then come up with an excuse as soon as possible after you say no… but even just repeating the word “no” alone is often enough at first without feeling bad about it afterward!
Don’t let yourself be bullied by manipulative people.
You should not let yourself be bullied by manipulative people. One way to do this is not to have a confrontation with them but rather keep your distance and avoid contact. Another strategy is to find out what they want from you then refuse it either in words or deeds. You can also try changing tactics so that the manipulator doesn’t know how to handle you because of their indecision about how you should behave.
- Don’t let yourself be bullied by manipulative people.
- Manipulative behavior often comes across as aggressive.
- Try not to have confrontations with manipulative people.
- If someone tries to manipulate, use passive resistance strategies like refusing requests outright or simply walking away.
Stand up for yourself – speak up and don’t stay silent in uncomfortable situations.
One of the ways to express subtlety is to stand up for yourself. You can’t be subtle when you’re silent and taken advantage of in uncomfortable situations. It’s important to speak up so that the people taking advantage of your silence know that they are inappropriate!
It could also mean speaking less, using more body language (lip biting), or not asking questions about how you look all the time; these things show confidence without needing words!
Asking thoughtful questions is a great way to get others talking because it shows interest, making them feel comfortable with you while still maintaining subtlety.
Start a conversation with someone new at least once a week
Conversation with someone new at least once a week is an easy way to be subtle. This will allow you to get in with people and their agenda, making it easier for you to manipulate them later on down the line!
If you are looking for something more time-intensive, try starting conversations at grocery stores or coffee shops (don’t make eye contact!)
Good conversation starters include: “What do you think of this day?” or “Hey how’s your weekend going?”. These questions can lead to many topics that might interest both parties. Once they say what they have been doing all week/weekend, ask some follow-up questions like if there was anything weird happen? If someone had one good anecdote from last night, use it as a segue point.
Keep your goals in mind and be persistent.
Keep your goals in mind and be persistent. This will help you maintain the patience and discipline to reach your desired outcome.
Be willing to take risks to ensure success. One common risk is “re-framing” an idea or situation so that it falls within one of your goals, even if it needs a little tweaking (e.g., accepting feedback on how you presented something). If this can be done without affecting other aspects of the goal, then do it!
Research has shown that when people are trying to control others by being subtle, they use brain tricks such as reverse psychology which include tactics like pretending not to care about someone’s opinion until they feel obligated, turning down a request for assistance with enthusiasm while smiling coyly at them, giving compliments.
Be patient
The patient is essential in every step of life. You must have patience with yourself and the people around you. The world will not change overnight, so stay patient with everything that is happening.
- When someone asks for advice or help, be honest but don’t provide all of your insight at once. It’ll keep them coming back to get more information from you in the future, which means they will likely buy something else from you – such as a service or product.
- Be mindful about how much time it takes for things to happen throughout the day when deciding what should be done next (i.e., If there are only 15 minutes before lunch, can I make this phone call?)
- Don’t act like an expert if you’re not one yet; subtly
Don’t let others control you
You should have no regrets, and you should be the one in control of your own life. You are who you want to be.
You can’t make someone else choose what they want for themselves; don’t let them take away from your choice-making power with their manipulation tactics. What if they’re trying to manipulate us into doing things that we would never do on our own? If it feels wrong, turn around and walk away before any damage is done.–Jessica Blythe
What does it mean to be subtle? It doesn’t necessarily mean being underhanded or deceptive – but rather, a way how people can influence others without directly influencing them at all. Subtlety comes in many forms: sometimes there might not even need to have.
Manipulate people with a vulnerability to get what you want
If you can manipulate people with vulnerability, then you will have a huge advantage over them.
This is how to be subtle because you get what you want by manipulating others with their vulnerabilities.
You could manipulate people with a certain fear or need, and they may do anything for that. You need to find out what it is so that you can take full advantage of it when an opportunity presents itself and get your desired result.
How about using manipulation through guilt? This works well when someone feels guilty about something bad they did in the past, which isn’t visible anymore but still has emotional effects (yours). Maybe this was related to money or work ethic; if they don’t feel good enough about themselves, they’ll give.
Use the power of a compliment to manipulate someone’s behavior.
To express your subtlety, use the power of a compliment. When you want to manipulate someone’s behavior, or elicit their cooperation in performing the desired action, start your request with an open-ended question such as “What are some ideas for solving this problem?” Or by starting the conversation with positive statements like “I really appreciated how hard you worked on that project.”
Instead of saying things directly and bluntly, try making requests using words to sound more subtle. If you want them to do something instead, say, “How can I help?” or ask if there is anything you could assist them with. You would be surprised how many people will comply when we use these phrases rather than direct orders from others.
Understand that manipulation is all about getting what YOU want, not what they want
You know that manipulation is wrong, and you know that it’s wrong to manipulate others. But why does manipulation happen? It happens because people are self-centered: they want what THEY want, not what the other person wants. If someone is manipulating you, then he thinks, “Hey! This means I get my way!”
Why do manipulators always focus on themselves? They feel entitled – they think their needs are more important than anyone else’s. To them, life becomes a competition where everything has an object or goal for one person to win out over another. At times we all fall into this pattern of selfishness, but when we’re aware of our habits, like how often we compare ourselves with others or how much time we spend thinking about them.
Recognize when you are being manipulated
If someone is manipulating you, you will most likely feel angry or uncomfortable about the situation.
- Ask yourself: Is this controlling person aware of how they’re making me feel?
- Take a moment and decide if it is worth the emotional toll to stay in contact with this person. If not, sever ties as soon as possible without drama involved.
If you are manipulating someone else (and know that), then make sure your target has the power to say no. Don’t try convincing them; instead, make requests and allow them time to respond at their own pace. Be mindful of any tricks you might be used on others, such as charm, guilt trips, threats, etc.
Change the way you think about manipulation.
You can change the way you think about manipulation. A manipulator aims to make their victim feel as though they have no other option but to do what the manipulator wants them to do. A subtle person knows that their actions and words must be calculated for a manipulative outcome instead of being impulsive or too overt, which would give away intent. Manipulators will use this information against you, so it becomes important not only how you act (or don’t act) but also how you present yourself; your appearance, attitude, tone of voice–everything counts when trying not to show yourself who and what you are.
Understand what is motivating the manipulator
When you can understand what motivates the manipulator, you can anticipate their next move and work to prevent it. This is important because often, manipulators will create a situation where they will be the victims for sympathy while at the same time taking advantage of another person’s weaknesses to get what they want from them.
For example, an individual may have been manipulated by someone who had created drama in their life (created conflict) through lies or poor communication practices while simultaneously asking this individual to do tasks that are not easy for them but entail certain risks or inconveniences such as looking after children on very short notice when there was no one else available.
Use a friendly tone of voice to avoid sounding threatening or manipulative
You must use a friendly tone to avoid sounding like you are manipulating someone. If your voice is too high-pitch, then it can sound pushy and coercive.
Tell them what they want to know (i.e., how much money you make) or ask a neutral question about their day/week that will hopefully prompt them for more information on how things went at work.
Instead of saying, “You need this!” try framing the conversation as if they already have it: “Hey look – I found something perfect for you.” This still doesn’t give away the gift but also sounds less demanding than telling someone outright that they need something from us.
Summing Up,
Manipulation is a powerful tool. Some people use it to get what they want, but others are manipulated by those who have power over them. It takes courage and strength to stand up for yourself when someone else tries to control or manipulate your behavior with vulnerability. But suppose you can find the right words and keep your facial expressions neutral. In that case, you’ll be able to protect yourself from manipulation tactics without having any negative consequences on the other person’s feelings. If you’re looking to know how to be subtle, follow step by step this guide.